Nashville no home away from home for lonely ex-Oilers fan

Ed de la Garza

I can't understand this faction of die-hard Oiler fans. I listen to sports talk shows because, well, I have no life. Without fail, I hear a caller saying, "I'm a big Oilers fan, and I'm still going to root for them in Tennessee."

What? From the moment I became a sports fan, I rooted for the home teams, especially the Oilers. They broke my heart over and over and over again, but I kept coming back like the idiot I am. When the Tennessee talk started, I kept hoping that there was a chance they'd stay, but they're gone. I started distancing myself from them after last season.

I don't care that it's Bud who took them, or that Mike "Satan" McClure engineered the whole thing. The team is gone, and they don't care, so long as they get their million-dollar paychecks.

I remember Jeff Fisher, Floyd Reese and the Derrick Dolls strutting around Hickville for season ticket sales. If they would rather have a bunch of inbred, Garth-Brooks-wannabe, Graceland-visiting, NECKAR-watching hicks for fans, let them go. Here's to a glorious 0-16 season.

The only problem I have is who to root for. It can't be the Cowboys. Don't give me that Texas thing, either. Cleveland wouldn't pull for Cincinnati, Pittsburgh doesn't pull for Philly, and powder blue fans don't pull for Dallas.

My new team has to be pathetic, but with the hint of an upside. I'd say Tampa Bay, but the Bucs might actually make the playoffs this year. The Jets are too far away, and Baltimore has that Bud clone for an owner.

It has to be the New Orleans Saints. They're at least three years away from respectability, and they have that wicked color scheme. Maybe we can steal them away.

de la Garza is a junior

political science major.

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