|Tuesday, February 22, 2000||
Volume 65, Issue 100
||Don't let him get
away for good
Because of past columns, many of my readers have come to the conclusion that I am anti-male. Let me just set the record straight by saying that I'm not. I just think that sometimes males do really stupid things only because they listen to something other than their brain.
This is not a male-bashing article, so I can admit that sometimes females act irrationally. I know I do.
But sometimes acting irrationally can be good. Especially if you like someone; just summon the courage and ask them out. Here's an example:
I have a friend, let's call her Nina. She likes this guy, say Derek. She has had her eye on him for a while now, oh, let's say about a semester. Sound familiar? I know that I can relate to this story, but my ending is a little different, and well, Nina's story doesn't have an ending yet. We'll discuss this later.
So anyway, Nina comes to me to ask for advice. I simply tell her to go up to him and ask him out. She says, "No! I can't do that."
"Why?" I ask.
Nina then explains that she can't because she has put him on such a high pedestal that now he seems untouchable. Still sound familiar?
Isn't it weird that as soon as you like someone, you automatically put them on a pedestal? By putting them up there, you begin to believe you are not good enough, that he or she deserves better than you. I know that it happens to me quite often. So how do you get over that belief?
I just say, "The hell with it and go for him. At whatever cost."
I mean, what do you have to lose? Maybe you'll be embarrassed by being turned down. But what's a little embarrassment if everything works out for the best?
Nowadays you can't even count on the guy to make the first move. They are so dense at times. Are they blind? How much signaling does a girl have to do before a guy realizes she likes him?
But then again some girls are just weird about their hints and flirtations, so I can understand why a guy might be confused.
If you are humiliated, it will only be for a short while, whereas you could go a lifetime questioning yourself with "What ifs?" Instead, take the initiative and ask him. In the case of Nina, she even turned down another guy because of Derek.
That is pathetic in the eyes of other people. Even Nina realizes that she might have passed up a great opportunity just because she didn't have the guts to find out if it was even possible for something to happen between her and Derek.
And in my case, I finally got tired of all of those "what ifs" and took the first step toward what became a beautiful relationship.
I have to admit that it was pretty hard, but in the end, I'm glad that I did what I did. Not only did I gain a close friend but also a wonderful boyfriend.
To Nina and all of the single people who didn't choose to be single, go ahead and ask. It will forever change the course of your life. It may be for the better or it may be for the worse; who knows and who cares? Isn't that what life is about? Taking chances?
So, a sophomore marketing major,