Desperados anxious about
When this semester began I was eight hours
short of being classified as a senior in college. Soon, those eight hours
and six more, will be completed.
Now, I find myself in a puzzling dilemma.
Within the next few weeks, I will become a 20-year-old senior.
The student population strives towards
the common goal of obtaining a piece of paper from UH that says, "You did
So, what's the problem? Well, college graduates
are adults, right? I'm not.
Graduation is frightening. I've been a
student for the past 16 or so years. That was both my job and the center
of my social world. The change between student and graduate is tremendous.
With so little time left in school, the
realization dawned on me that I may not be ready to graduate and get tossed
out into the cold, cruel world as an adult quite yet.
My friends and I have a hard time calling
each adults. It seems like only yesterday we got our high school diplomas.
Granted, looking back at the past three
years, I realize the Melissa Kummer who began college in 1998 is not the
same Melissa Kummer who is writing this column today.
My priorities have changed from a shallow
need for new clothes and concert tickets to the desire to become independent
and appreciative of the good things I have in my life.
Isn't it amazing what happens to you when
you grow up? Things you've taken for granted all your life are viewed in
a new light. They become important gifts for which you should be thankful.
Suddenly school becomes fun, siblings evolve
into friends and parents shed their image as the stupidest people you know.
Some people believe everyone has three
personas: the person others perceive, one's own perception of oneself and
the person one truly is.
The goal, if I might venture an educated
guess, is to make the three as unified as possible.
If the point of life is to survive it,
success is doomed. However, if there is some deeper meaning, that would
explain why people say "life is hard."
As for those who say that being an adult
means getting up at 6 a.m. and driving through rush-hour traffic to a full-time
job every day, there's no problem here. That sounds like college.
Unfortunately, I think being an adult means
something more internal, something you can't measure with a clock.
If it means getting to the point in your
life where you can say "Thank you" for all the things you have taken for
granted since birth, most of us are well on our way to becoming adults.
As the transition from one stage of life
into the next stage nears for those lucky students who paid their dues
and hold their heads high, the rest of us wonder what it will be like when
we earn our caps and gowns.
If graduating college is as smooth a transition
as graduating from high school, I can take it. If not, I don't know what
I must admit the unknown makes me nervous.
Will we magically be forced to transform into adults? If so, I might start
considering a new double major that would extend my college time by two
or three years.