Tuesday, January 23, 2001 Volume 66, Issue 80


 
 









 

It's showtime for the Republicans

Adam Elrod

Much like the inauguration of our 40th President, Ronald Reagan, the inauguration of President George W. Bush on Saturday marked the end of a hostage crisis that has gripped the United States.

But while Reagan's inception marked the end of the Iran hostage crisis, the beginning of the second Bush administration marks the finale of the period during which the American people have been held hostage by the ultra-liberal wing of the Democratic Party. Or, as political commentator William Kristol so eloquently stated, "Our long national nightmare is over."

Radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh occasionally comments on being asked what he would talk about on his show without the Clinton administration to kick around, and similar questions have been posed to me over the last few weeks. As Limbaugh points out, just because liberals are no longer in power does not mean they'll go away completely -- we're not that lucky.

My job as a conservative columnist is not complete until every person in America agrees with me, so as long as liberals still exist, I will still have plenty to write about. If the inauguration festivities of Saturday are any indication, it looks to be an amusing four years in conservative punditry.

Liberals are consistently more amusing when they are out of power. When they occupy the White House or Congress, their wacky ideas get attached to legislation -- and they become dangerous. But, when they no longer occupy positions of power, they take to the streets in the most hilarious displays of idiocy imaginable.

Take the inauguration, for instance: While Republicans and conservatives were celebrating victory with parties and a parade, liberal protesters took to the street to whine about their defeat.

They spouted protest chants like, "George Bush, go away! Racist, sexist, anti-gay!" and held signs sporting such profound sayings as "Hail to the Thief."

When liberals take office, the politicians take over, and we get a more sublimated version the ideology. But when they finally leave power, the liberal party is turned back over to hippie college students, environmentalist wackos (Green Peace), feminists (NOW) and the crazy animal rights movement (PETA).

We no longer get substantive policy speeches from liberal political figures -- we get global marches for nuclear disarmament, logging protests in the form of naked tree-sitting, animal-rights nuts throwing paint on fur coats, feminist protests and sit-ins, and long-haired hippie college students staging asinine events at every imaginable place.

This is endlessly more amusing than anything that has happened in the past eight years. This is true liberalism in action -- and columnists like myself simply sit back and laugh and write.

The confirmation hearings for Attorney General-designate John Ashcroft are likely indicative of the problems that will surround the Democrats for the next two to four years.

Sen. Ted Kennedy leveled both barrels at Ashcroft in frustration, yet it appears his attacks will go unheard. Ashcroft will be confirmed with ease, and conservatism will again regain control of the Justice Department.

Without control of any government branch, liberals will be able to make a lot of noise in opposition -- but, in the end, they will be powerless to stop the second conservative revolution in a decade.

This is one of the many reasons I am looking forward to the next four years. Not only are the conservatives in complete control of the government, but, in their desperate attempt to grapple back into power, liberals will be far more fun to ridicule.

Elrod, a political science major, can be 
reached at THEPATRIOT1776@hotmail.com.

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