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Volume 68, Issue 56, Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Opinion
 

We shouldnit be so submissive

Randy Woock
Opinion Columnist 

Time to break out the whips, wipe down your leather mask, oil the handcuffs and get your mouth ready to take on a ball-gag, ‘cause for the next 600 words weill be yapping about submission.

And since nothing gets things going like a wee bit oi confession (á la those naughty adolescent games of Truth or Dare), you should know that this isnit going to be about the fun kind of submission. No one in this column is going to bind and gag you, and unfortunately Iim all out of nipple clamps. Sorry.

You will, however, be referred to several times as "slave," so donit toss the paper away just yet (at least not before reading those great Daily Cougar comics).

I canit help but notice a disturbing trend among peasants and plebeians. We have an alarming tendency towards submission — toward doing what weire told far too often. To be fair, weire not the first generation to do this. Hell, weire not even the only species to do this. Most sentient life forms have a dominance-submission hierarchy. But, since weire cognizant enough to recognize whatis going on, we ought to be ballsy enough to do something about it.

The whole "Doing-What-Youire-Told" shtick has been going on for quite some time. Probably since before we came down out of the trees, since before we could actually be considered human (or before Adam and Eve got tossed out of Eden, for all you kids out there who havenit paid attention in any class since Sunday School).

Itis time we, as a species, said a hale and hearty farewell and good frickini riddance to our submissive tendencies. Sure, they mightive served a survival role throughout history; if one did what the marauding bands of Alpha Males said, maybe they wouldnit kill you (not that submitting was any sort of guarantee; see Wounded Knee, Attica, Thibodaux, Jenin, Tienamen, Ludlow, etc. ad nauseam). But now itis time to ditch the reflex that has us bowing and scraping before any human codpiece with a title, a badge or a flag.

Why do you do what these people tell you? Are you afraid that theyill hurt you? Will the judge lock you in a cage if you donit give off the proper submissive signals? Will your parents stop loving you if you do something with your life other than what theyive laid out for you? Will your professors flunk you from the course if you donit agree with their pet theories? Will you burn in everlasting torment if you donit follow the arcane practices set forth by your clergy?

Have you been programmed by society to do what these people tell you? Do you grovel in obeisance before these alpha monkeys? Sure you do. Rationalize your submissive actions all you want, but all the excuses in the world wonit make you any less of a slave.

So maybe youire free-range. Nifty. So are plenty of other cattle in the herd. So long as you let other people tell you what to do in life youire their puppet. Are you your own person or not?

Hereis a simple idea: I say to hell with these people. Forget about bosses, cops, judges, parents, politicians, professors, priests, popes, pastors, pundits and any other, who think they know whatis right for you better than you do.

A little tyrranicide may be what your lifeis been lacking.

Woock, a senior psychology major, 
can be reached at nrrandy@hotmail.com

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