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Volume 72, Issue 28, Thursday, September 28, 2006


Don't pass that legislation, governor

Christian Ochoa
Opinion Columnist

Dear Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, 

Hello there, governor. I'm Christian -- I mean, that's my name, not my religion. I'm a student and a writer at the University of Houston. I'm a big fan of you, sir. Not necessarily of your movies, though. Granted, True Lies did have some awesome scenes that my 10-year-old self reveled in, but there's no way that you could hang onto Jamie Lee Curtis on that helicopter. 

I've recently taken an interest in Californian politics thanks to you, Gov. Schwarzenegger. 

I'm here in Texas, governor, and I already have enough politicos filling up my plate: loud-mouthed Carole Keeton-Strayhorn, hairspray-friendly Rick Perry and the ever-talented Kinky Friedman. But in November, Texas and California -- I hope -- will have another thing in common besides illegal immigrants, hot weather and traffic jams: an entertainer as a governor. Minnesota did it; California did it; and Texas can do it. 

But this letter is for you. Every time I turned on the news, you always made me smile if a report mentioned California's fearless governor. 

First, the media reported the crazy election that you somehow won. Then reporters told us about your "girly men" and "gropinator" controversies. I forgot which came first, but hey, it's all the same. 

Recently, the news mentioned something about you calling someone in your cabinet or a fellow political figure "hot" and made a comment about her Puerto Rican posterior. 

Some saw those statements as "controversial," but they always brighten up my day, because Gov. Schwarzenegger always had best intentions for California. 

But now, it seems you've gone crazy with a new piece of legislation -- well, too crazy for my taste. 

The Associated Press reported you recently approved Bill AB 2612 in California, a bill that would make it illegal for someone to take more than 25 free newspapers. 

Granted, there have been cases where some crazies took about 1,000 campus newspapers in Berkeley, Calif., but there's no need to pass a legislation that criminalizes petty pranks. 

Cases in which people tried to censor an idea by stealing hundreds of newspapers are on a different spectrum than someone trying to make a quick buck by stealing community and liberal papers and taking them to the recycling plant. 

High-five from Texas, Gov. Schwarzenegger, for passing legislation to protect local and indie papers from being censored. However, two thumbs down -- way down -- for passing an overbearing legislation that's going to be more of a hassle in the future. 

Please, Gov. Schwarzenegger, stick with what you know and love: putting on a show, canoodling with your sexy, Democratic wife and giving tours to Rio de Janiero, Brazil for Carnival. 

Yes, I've seen the YouTube video where a film crew follows you during your adventure in Carnival where you party with women and offer to teach a most useful English word: "biting."

California, despite what you might have thought, Gov. Schwarzenegger, is not an action—packed state that requires extreme measures to get things done. 

Ochoa, a creative writing junior, 
can be reached at 

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